Sunday Christians

I love my church. It has been my second home since 2001. For the first time in a lifetime of spiritual searching, I found a place where the worship was real and powerful, the people were down-to-earth and spiritually genuine, and the unconditional love of Christ was demonstrated in every way possible. Real women! All in love with Jesus, living lfe to the fullest, pastoring one another with love and compassion. I was thrilled, I was shocked, I was hooked.

The entire year I was living in Monticello, I missed my church and my Y more than my blood family. And that's the horrible, honest truth.

But now, the spiritual climate has changed- at least toward me. My welcome has been chilly as of late (due to my adulterous status, I am sure,) and today I was blown off by two women I once considered my good friends. My best friend and her husband (who are marriage counselors, no less,) had to run to the pastor and counsel with HIM before mediating with Troy and me! (and I am sure they related the story to him in full.) Even R- whom I brought into the church as a confused, hurt, spiritually bound baby Christian- has kept her distance from me.

I could be hurt. I could be offended. But instead, I have chosen to be stubborn. New Life is MY church home, and I dare anyone to try to run me out.

And: FUCK YOU ALL. My marital status or lack thereof is no reflection of my love for God, or His love for me. Hate me, gossip about me, ignore me- I don't care. But just know I would never- could never- treat you the way you are treating me.